Today is Friday. I am home alone. The school district has scheduled an "inclement weather-make up day" and there are no classes. But because it's rather difficult to leave Puppy with just anyone, which has become practically no one, my boss is very understanding of this and has given me the day off.
And as for Monday, there are also no classes because they have a "staff development day" when teachers get updated on stuff, or catch up on work, or not really sure what they do. But that's not important, what is important is that Puppy needs attention that day. So my boss already gave me the day off, and the only thing is I'm going to need to ask for Friday morning to take Puppy to the orthodontist. So I might trade Monday for Friday morning.
Friday, February 22, 2013
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Tired evening and morning
All went well yesterday...until I picked up Puppy from daycare. When I got to the daycare and waited outside the door for it to be opened I noticed something different. There was a flowerpot with dirt and cigarette buds in it. Once in the truck Puppy started asking, "Mom, can you buy me cigarettes?" And asking why not, and begging and pleading with me to buy them for him. I can so understand how he may have seen the buds on his way in earlier, then on his way out; and this may have triggered him to think about the cigarettes, it's something that simple.
So we are headed home and talk about bad timing. I had to stop at the convenience store for breakfast items and just as I expected, it escalates to a full blown plead for me to buy cigarettes. He's screaming, tugging at my arm, and making tears to seek out sympathy. I say, "NO" and we get off the truck. He follows me like my shadow would. We go to the register and he keeps both hands in his pocket and just watches as I pay and head for the door. He follows with no more words. We are in the truck and he starts to speak. "Mom, you see how I behave?" He must have realized how he was acting earlier and remembered that his teacher told him she can see him in the truck with cameras. And if that didn't do it, I don't really care why he calmed down, just that he did. As we started driving home he started up again and continued to ask for cigarettes but in a calm tone, all the way home.
Once home he asked to go next door. I didn't allow it because he has already stolen a box of cigarettes from the neighbor and I assumed that was exactly what he had in mind. But the other neighbor was outside so I allowed that for a few minutes. A few minutes turned into about 45 minutes before he returned home.
He was in a good mood up until I reminded him that we had to get homework done and he had to shower before bedtime. Needless to say, none of this happened the way it had played out in my head. He said a few colorful words to let me know it was a "no go" and headed up to his room. Once there, I pushed for him to shower. He started into a debate about not wanting to and how he was tired and had a fever, etc. I was already tired myself and asked one more time before walking away to ignore his actions.
While alone in his room he was in overload and bit his finger causing injury to it with his braces and the cut was enough to make it bleed. So he calls me over to his room. I walk in to see the blood all over his finger and I remember taking a deep breath to help me continue with whatever came next.
After cleaning up and getting an explanation of how he hurt himself, he begins crying with tears and begs that he has a fever and can't shower. My mind is tired from the debating and I let him change into sleepwear and tuck him into bed. I get the silence I was hoping for...until he starts calling me upstairs again. He apologizes for his behavior, he promises to sleep and cause no more trouble.
I got my silence again and was already contemplating the morning routine being interrupted by some signs of anxiety and debate as to how he would be in trouble for not completing his homework. But then I cleared my mind and focused on my evening TV shows and went to bed tired as usual.
This morning was a repeat of the visions I had the night before. Tantrums, banging of the head on table and wall, hitting himself with closed fists, and the loud crying with tears were the scene at our home as I prepare my first cup of coffee. He was nervous as he remembered his behavior last night and begged me not to make him go to school today. After much consoling and some lying, I promised to write a note to his teacher explaining his fever last night to excuse him from homework. But I actually wrote a note telling her how it really went down. We have a deal where whenever I tell her about incidents, she tells him she saw his on the cameras so I am not the tattle-tell and they discuss his behaviors. I hope it goes well for him at school today. Good luck, Puppy.
So we are headed home and talk about bad timing. I had to stop at the convenience store for breakfast items and just as I expected, it escalates to a full blown plead for me to buy cigarettes. He's screaming, tugging at my arm, and making tears to seek out sympathy. I say, "NO" and we get off the truck. He follows me like my shadow would. We go to the register and he keeps both hands in his pocket and just watches as I pay and head for the door. He follows with no more words. We are in the truck and he starts to speak. "Mom, you see how I behave?" He must have realized how he was acting earlier and remembered that his teacher told him she can see him in the truck with cameras. And if that didn't do it, I don't really care why he calmed down, just that he did. As we started driving home he started up again and continued to ask for cigarettes but in a calm tone, all the way home.
Once home he asked to go next door. I didn't allow it because he has already stolen a box of cigarettes from the neighbor and I assumed that was exactly what he had in mind. But the other neighbor was outside so I allowed that for a few minutes. A few minutes turned into about 45 minutes before he returned home.
He was in a good mood up until I reminded him that we had to get homework done and he had to shower before bedtime. Needless to say, none of this happened the way it had played out in my head. He said a few colorful words to let me know it was a "no go" and headed up to his room. Once there, I pushed for him to shower. He started into a debate about not wanting to and how he was tired and had a fever, etc. I was already tired myself and asked one more time before walking away to ignore his actions.
While alone in his room he was in overload and bit his finger causing injury to it with his braces and the cut was enough to make it bleed. So he calls me over to his room. I walk in to see the blood all over his finger and I remember taking a deep breath to help me continue with whatever came next.
After cleaning up and getting an explanation of how he hurt himself, he begins crying with tears and begs that he has a fever and can't shower. My mind is tired from the debating and I let him change into sleepwear and tuck him into bed. I get the silence I was hoping for...until he starts calling me upstairs again. He apologizes for his behavior, he promises to sleep and cause no more trouble.
I got my silence again and was already contemplating the morning routine being interrupted by some signs of anxiety and debate as to how he would be in trouble for not completing his homework. But then I cleared my mind and focused on my evening TV shows and went to bed tired as usual.
This morning was a repeat of the visions I had the night before. Tantrums, banging of the head on table and wall, hitting himself with closed fists, and the loud crying with tears were the scene at our home as I prepare my first cup of coffee. He was nervous as he remembered his behavior last night and begged me not to make him go to school today. After much consoling and some lying, I promised to write a note to his teacher explaining his fever last night to excuse him from homework. But I actually wrote a note telling her how it really went down. We have a deal where whenever I tell her about incidents, she tells him she saw his on the cameras so I am not the tattle-tell and they discuss his behaviors. I hope it goes well for him at school today. Good luck, Puppy.
Monday, February 18, 2013
Weekend getaway
This past weekend was just what we needed. Puppy and I joined other family members on a trip to Austin, Texas, to celebrate my niece's 7th birthday party.
Puppy and I quickly packed our bags after I picked him up from daycare on Friday when I got out of work. We rode with my sister Cookie, to San Antonio that night. We stayed at her daughter's (my niece and her boyfriend's). We went out to dinner and had a pleasant meal with good company, my nephew Bobby and his girlfriend joined us. It had been a long evening with the two and a half hours drive, so after a little conversation we headed to sleep. Puppy was a wonderful passenger on our drive and was well behaved at the restaurant.
Oh boy. See this is what happens, interruptions. Puppy is calling me upstairs to tuck him into bed. This is why I can't seem to finish writing anything.
I don't want to keep you waiting for the rest of the story about our weekend, but I will tell you this...Puppy was the best he had been in a long time. Not one single tantrum, or angry face, or bad word. He was easy going, patient and we enjoyed our time out of town with our family. He received so much praise and recognition from me for his good behavior. I could tell that he was proud of himself and he was aware of how he had not been angry and never caused self-injury all three days of our trip. It was a great feeling for both of us.
Puppy and I quickly packed our bags after I picked him up from daycare on Friday when I got out of work. We rode with my sister Cookie, to San Antonio that night. We stayed at her daughter's (my niece and her boyfriend's). We went out to dinner and had a pleasant meal with good company, my nephew Bobby and his girlfriend joined us. It had been a long evening with the two and a half hours drive, so after a little conversation we headed to sleep. Puppy was a wonderful passenger on our drive and was well behaved at the restaurant.
Oh boy. See this is what happens, interruptions. Puppy is calling me upstairs to tuck him into bed. This is why I can't seem to finish writing anything.
I don't want to keep you waiting for the rest of the story about our weekend, but I will tell you this...Puppy was the best he had been in a long time. Not one single tantrum, or angry face, or bad word. He was easy going, patient and we enjoyed our time out of town with our family. He received so much praise and recognition from me for his good behavior. I could tell that he was proud of himself and he was aware of how he had not been angry and never caused self-injury all three days of our trip. It was a great feeling for both of us.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
On the bus
My days are filled with thoughts of trying to steer Puppy in the right direction. I try to think of ways to distract him from his wallets. I'm not very successful because he's tied to wallets as if they were an extra limb to his body. His everyday is planned with him either having the wallet in his pocket or securely placed in a drawer at home where he feels no one else will see it and take it (the latter is easy because we don't get many visitors).
Of course, his teacher and the assistants are fully aware of his obsession since they have been together for three school years, now. We seem to be working as best as we can to manage the wallet issues. But how can we continue procedures that have been in place and working between them at school with Puppy if there is an interruption in the middle?
This morning Puppy told me that yesterday he had asked the bus driver and monitor to buy him a wallet, a Nautica wallet, which is his favorite brand at the moment. Apparently, they are conversing on the bus about wallets. I had mentioned it to his teacher before the holidays. Puppy was coming home telling me stories of their conversations and I also instructed him not to talk about wallets on the bus, but the obsession is too strong and if he can find someone to listen, it's going to happen.
But talking and listening are one thing. Giving him used credit cards to place in his wallet is another thing. Puppy has had credit cards and business cards to fill over a dozen wallets. He picks up business cards wherever he sees them. And I am guilty of giving him his first set of used credit cards. But he shuffles between them, switches around as the different cards lose or gain his interest.
However, he has obviously made a connection on the bus and is receiving cards from the bus monitor. He feels so secure with her that asking for a wallet seemed easy and alright.
So, with four and a half months to go before ending this school year (not including extended school year), I am crossing my fingers that we can manage to keep our current bus driver and monitor after we explain to them that they need to refrain from talking about wallets or credit cards with Puppy. I know he can be demanding and down right pushy if he wants attention. But indulging him with attention about his greatest obsession may not be helping anyone, especially Puppy.
This has happened before and the previous bus monitor also went overboard with giving Puppy attention he wanted on the bus and now it is part of his private practice to repeat her words and phrases. She was his bus monitor last year and was moved to another bus after several requests were made and she didn't comply. The simplest things can be harmful if we don't understand the big picture.
Of course, his teacher and the assistants are fully aware of his obsession since they have been together for three school years, now. We seem to be working as best as we can to manage the wallet issues. But how can we continue procedures that have been in place and working between them at school with Puppy if there is an interruption in the middle?
This morning Puppy told me that yesterday he had asked the bus driver and monitor to buy him a wallet, a Nautica wallet, which is his favorite brand at the moment. Apparently, they are conversing on the bus about wallets. I had mentioned it to his teacher before the holidays. Puppy was coming home telling me stories of their conversations and I also instructed him not to talk about wallets on the bus, but the obsession is too strong and if he can find someone to listen, it's going to happen.
But talking and listening are one thing. Giving him used credit cards to place in his wallet is another thing. Puppy has had credit cards and business cards to fill over a dozen wallets. He picks up business cards wherever he sees them. And I am guilty of giving him his first set of used credit cards. But he shuffles between them, switches around as the different cards lose or gain his interest.
However, he has obviously made a connection on the bus and is receiving cards from the bus monitor. He feels so secure with her that asking for a wallet seemed easy and alright.
So, with four and a half months to go before ending this school year (not including extended school year), I am crossing my fingers that we can manage to keep our current bus driver and monitor after we explain to them that they need to refrain from talking about wallets or credit cards with Puppy. I know he can be demanding and down right pushy if he wants attention. But indulging him with attention about his greatest obsession may not be helping anyone, especially Puppy.
This has happened before and the previous bus monitor also went overboard with giving Puppy attention he wanted on the bus and now it is part of his private practice to repeat her words and phrases. She was his bus monitor last year and was moved to another bus after several requests were made and she didn't comply. The simplest things can be harmful if we don't understand the big picture.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Picking up off the floor
Yup, he did it again. Puppy had asked to go across the street to keep the old man company while he worked on his truck. I get so tired of arguing with him that I allowed for a five minute visit and no longer. It seems that five minutes was just long enough for him to search his surroundings and find exactly what he was looking for...cigarettes. But these were not just any cigarettes, they were those metal ones that come in screw parts to make one, probably for persons either trying to quit or wanting to smoke indoors while avoiding the smoke, I don't know.
So he had them in his pockets for about one hour on Monday. He could no longer keep the secret to himself and came to tell me, "Mom, can I talk to you?" I always worry what surprise is going to follow this question. He's a bright kid and begins to explain that they are not real cigarettes and that the man gave them to him. And this smart child makes sure he keeps them hidden in his room while revealing this information to avoid me taking them from him. I convince him that I have no clue what he's talking about and would like to see them. He brings them to me and of course I give him a speech I've repeated so many times before. I clearly see he's not handing them over, they are now his prized possessions. Remember that he is observant and mimics everything, so ripping them out of his hand or screaming and shouting are not the way to go here. I coach him to give them up without success. So our evening routine continues and he is finally in bed.
Tuesday morning he rises with energy and has at least taken my advice not to take them to school. He knows that unwanted behavior will remove him from the classroom on Thursday while they have their Christmas party. While having breakfast we discuss all the negatives about the cigarettes and by some miracle he decides to comply and he throws the cigarettes in the kitchen trashcan right before the bus arrives to take him to school. What a huge relief it was for me. The sweet smell of success is actually a dirty stinky one.
Knowing my son like I do; I waited for him to leave and went to retrieve them from the trashcan. Their smell is strong and I put them in a plastic zipper bag. I take them with me with the intentions of throwing them away, but not before I take a picture...just for you guys. :)
He had taken off the wrap of one so that it wouldn't look like a cigarette, he thinks things through sometimes.
Now to continue about how well I know my son. We come home last night and he's pacing around the kitchen. Instead of going upstairs to change, I suspect he's up to no good, and I begin washing dishes. Puppy starts to get anxious and even asks me why I'm not going upstairs. Since I'm not leaving he decides to be the most helpful child and asks if he can throw out the trash for me, and of course I let him. I gave him a few minutes and when he didn't return I went to find him emptying the contents on the driveway next to the outdoor trashcan. He's usually nervous when doing mischievous acts and is constantly looking around for someone to see who is watching him. After a minute Puppy saw me standing there. He started cussing like a sailor and told me to "get the f*** out of here" and some other pretty words. I assured him I wasn't going anywhere and was going to wait until he cleaned up all his mess. Puppy continued to empty and search the contents of the bag until it was empty. He was getting even more angrier and confused. It was escalating and we were outdoors for the whole neighborhood to hear his screaming echos, just perfectly. I saw how determined he was to find them and was prepared to throw out all the contents of the large outdoor trashcan to find them. I told him he didn't find them because I had taken them out and threw them at a convenient store trashcan. I could see he was angry, but glad he didn't have to dig anymore. He gave me a few more selective words and we came inside to clean up. He cried and sought comfort and sympathy because his plan and his needs were not met. I hugged him and consoled him all the time asking him to jump in the shower and wash off all the germs from the trash. It only took about 30 minutes this time and he was showering. The entire evening went by with only a couple of soft hits to the walls with his head. Threats really, but no major tantrums, yea!
So what happened next? He switched his attention to his biceps. And again, after a lengthy talk about muscles he finally marched himself upstairs to bed. I was so tired after all the drama, that I actually slept like a baby.
So he had them in his pockets for about one hour on Monday. He could no longer keep the secret to himself and came to tell me, "Mom, can I talk to you?" I always worry what surprise is going to follow this question. He's a bright kid and begins to explain that they are not real cigarettes and that the man gave them to him. And this smart child makes sure he keeps them hidden in his room while revealing this information to avoid me taking them from him. I convince him that I have no clue what he's talking about and would like to see them. He brings them to me and of course I give him a speech I've repeated so many times before. I clearly see he's not handing them over, they are now his prized possessions. Remember that he is observant and mimics everything, so ripping them out of his hand or screaming and shouting are not the way to go here. I coach him to give them up without success. So our evening routine continues and he is finally in bed.
Tuesday morning he rises with energy and has at least taken my advice not to take them to school. He knows that unwanted behavior will remove him from the classroom on Thursday while they have their Christmas party. While having breakfast we discuss all the negatives about the cigarettes and by some miracle he decides to comply and he throws the cigarettes in the kitchen trashcan right before the bus arrives to take him to school. What a huge relief it was for me. The sweet smell of success is actually a dirty stinky one.
Knowing my son like I do; I waited for him to leave and went to retrieve them from the trashcan. Their smell is strong and I put them in a plastic zipper bag. I take them with me with the intentions of throwing them away, but not before I take a picture...just for you guys. :)
He had taken off the wrap of one so that it wouldn't look like a cigarette, he thinks things through sometimes.
Now to continue about how well I know my son. We come home last night and he's pacing around the kitchen. Instead of going upstairs to change, I suspect he's up to no good, and I begin washing dishes. Puppy starts to get anxious and even asks me why I'm not going upstairs. Since I'm not leaving he decides to be the most helpful child and asks if he can throw out the trash for me, and of course I let him. I gave him a few minutes and when he didn't return I went to find him emptying the contents on the driveway next to the outdoor trashcan. He's usually nervous when doing mischievous acts and is constantly looking around for someone to see who is watching him. After a minute Puppy saw me standing there. He started cussing like a sailor and told me to "get the f*** out of here" and some other pretty words. I assured him I wasn't going anywhere and was going to wait until he cleaned up all his mess. Puppy continued to empty and search the contents of the bag until it was empty. He was getting even more angrier and confused. It was escalating and we were outdoors for the whole neighborhood to hear his screaming echos, just perfectly. I saw how determined he was to find them and was prepared to throw out all the contents of the large outdoor trashcan to find them. I told him he didn't find them because I had taken them out and threw them at a convenient store trashcan. I could see he was angry, but glad he didn't have to dig anymore. He gave me a few more selective words and we came inside to clean up. He cried and sought comfort and sympathy because his plan and his needs were not met. I hugged him and consoled him all the time asking him to jump in the shower and wash off all the germs from the trash. It only took about 30 minutes this time and he was showering. The entire evening went by with only a couple of soft hits to the walls with his head. Threats really, but no major tantrums, yea!
So what happened next? He switched his attention to his biceps. And again, after a lengthy talk about muscles he finally marched himself upstairs to bed. I was so tired after all the drama, that I actually slept like a baby.
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